While some of our memories are painful, I certainly wouldn't trade them because they are what grew our hearts more towards Jesus. We have had to learn that marriage is not about pleasing ourselves or even the other person. It is about pleasing and honoring Jesus. When Jesus is the focus of a marriage, it can't help but blossom and grow in love.
I have compiled a list of helpful tips that will move marital hearts towards agape love.
*Do not act on feelings. Feelings are fleeting and can misdirect our words and actions. When you are feeling angry, jealous, grumpy, frustrated, etc. take a breather before you speak words.
*Grow your relationship with Jesus. He will create a heart that desires to give more than it receives.
*Pray for each other every single day.
*Pray for your marriage. Pray for a hedge of protection to be placed around each other and pray that your love will deepen with each day.
*Strive to please each other daily. If you know your spouse enjoys hot tea in the morning, make it for them without being asked. Small gestures go a long way.
*Discover each other's love language. Stay aware of it and speak the language daily.
*Flirt with your spouse. Just because you are married, doesn't mean you can't flirt. In fact, you should be flirting more now than when you were dating.
*Speaking of dating, plan dates often. When our children were younger and it was hard to get away, our dates consisted of putting the kids to bed and watching a movie.
*Laugh together. Remember not to take life too seriously.
*Do not give your spouse anything to be jealous of.
*Honor your spouse with your words, actions, and reactions.
*Don't ever speak ugly about your spouse...ever. Keep disagreements between the two of you.
*Remember that love isn't always gushy. You won't have butterflies every single day. But a Christ centered marriage will always have deep, unconditional love.
*Let go of hurts and move on. Do not hold on to arguments and never use them against your spouse.
*Don't forget to kiss and hug each other every day.
*Keep the romance alive. You know what your spouse likes, don't fail to do it because of laziness or being tired.
*Brag about your spouse in front of your spouse.
*Share secrets together.
A marriage full of love and appreciation is truly an art. It is beautiful and cannot be replicated with anyone else. It is one of the greatest gifts that God gives us. Cherish it and guard it with all that you have.