How to Begin to Find Peace

Lion's Lare Trail in Boulder, Colorado

I absolutely love hiking. My adrenaline is activated as I watch for bears, mountain lions, deer, and creepy, scary humans. As I walk along the trails, I inhale the clean air and take in the outrageously beautiful sights. I am amazed every single time that God created everything I encounter. When I am not chatting up my husband, I am talking with Jesus. I often revel in praise at His creation. However, there are times I pray for something that is heavy on my heart, be it a personal issue or an intercession for someone. 

I have been asked numerous times about my love of hiking. Aren't I afraid? What would I do if I encountered a curious creature? What's it like being so vulnerable? Have you ever been startled by another human? 

Notice that all of those questions focus on what could negatively happen. Not many people ask me to describe the most beautiful sights I have taken in. I have never been asked what it's like to be so immersed in God's creation.

My happy place is a mountain. Nature ignites my closeness with God and causes me to feel overwhelming peace. I can truly feel His presence among me, despite the dangers that are possibly lurking in the woods and around each bend. 

As I excitedly look forward to an upcoming trip to the mountains, I began to wonder why I am so peaceful and calm amongst possible dangers, yet I am often afraid by what if's in everyday life. God is the same. He's not different, I am. 

When I am hiking, I release my fears and put my total self in God's hands. I trust that He will protect me no matter what. I often cautiously scan my surroundings, but I do it with joy and peace.

As I scan my daily life and the worries I have tethered to my heart, I am left with anxiety, worry, and frustration. 

Why is it that I can't let go and fully trust when I am in regular life mode? 

Can you relate?

When I am on vacation, I tend to relax and rest in the moment. I bask in the beauty and refresh my body and soul. 

God calls us to do that every single day, no matter where we are physically and mentally. 

1 Peter 5:7 instructs us to "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you".

Matthew 6:27 tell us that worry cannot add a single hour to our life.

So let's just all stop worrying, fretting, and trying to control situations we really can't.

How dumb is that statement!? It's such an absurd command. I get so very irritated when I am stressed about something and people respond, "Just stop worrying." Oh duh! Why didn't I think of that! (Insert the biggest eye roll ever!)

Casting our cares and giving God the reigns we so desperately try to hang on to takes lots of practice. We must be patient and offer ourselves lots of grace. In truth, it's going to take a daily commitment to give God everything. We are going to slip up and worry so badly our bellies hurt many times. But God knows our intents. He knows when we truly try to give Him our concerns. 

As I am learning to do this more and more, I have found that uttering a simple prayer helps. When worry likes to set up camp in my overactive mind, I repeat over and over, "Jesus, I trust in You."  Prayer isn't meant to be long and drawn out. Prayer is talking to Jesus and sharing your heart. He doesn't give out prizes to the best speakers. He gives His overwhelming peace to those who truly seek and trust Him.

Many people know Jeremiah 29:11. We often cling to it when we are unsure of what is happening in our lives. Verses 12-13 aren't often quoted, however. I love these verses, as they instruct us to seek Him and assure us we will find Him. 

We've got this! We can imperfectly pray for trust and guidance. We can be assured that Jesus has us perfectly.  

Psalm 139:5 - You have encircled me; You have placed Your hand upon me.

Keep hiking up this mountain of life and rest in the truth that Jesus you regardless of your surroundings and circumstances.

With love,

Marci💗

Steadfast Wins the Race

Let’s be honest, we live in a world where we are told that we should look out for number one. To be truly happy, we should be our top priority. We have been conditioned to believe that the purpose of living is to be happy, no matter the cost. 

Life is all about us, right? Wrong! In fact, if you take an inventory of your life, I bet you’ll discover that your happiest moments, most joyous times, are when you are not focused on yourself at all. A bit of upside down thinking in our world.

Jesus has called us to love others and to look at them as more important than ourselves. Our work on this earth is to glorify Him by loving Him best and pouring His love into others. This isn’t always easy. In fact, it sometimes feels downright impossible to love others. Let’s be clear, Jesus never calls us to be a doormat. We are never to condone abuse or bullying of ourselves. That is not love for ourselves or the other person. 

So how can we be steadfast and firm in doing the work of the Lord? We can hold our tongues rather than lashing out. We can be charitable with our time and talents. We can help a neighbor in need. We can put down our phones and have real conversations. We can forgive.

What is something you can do today for the Lord? Whatever it is, be steadfast and firm. Your heart will be glad.

1 Corinthians 15:58 - Be firm, steadfast, always fully devoted to the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.

Go deeper with these corresponding verses:

Galatians 6:9 and Colossians 3:23-24

Not Your Ordinary Forgiveness Post

Ever been wronged?

Treated badly?

Gossiped about by a friend?

Been made to feel like a loser?

Rejected/abandoned?

Manipulated?

Gaslit?

Yep, same.  I raise my hand to all of those instances and more.  In truth, it makes me really angry sometimes to recall these.  In actuality, there are times these treatments occur and/or continue.

I have read countless articles, blog posts, and books about forgiveness.  Some have been super helpful, while some have made ME feel like the problem.  The latter infuriates me.  Nothing like victim blaming and shaming.

I'm just going to be transparent.  There's no use in hiding truths.  No one grows, learns, or can relate when we try and appear perfect, or dang near there.  I'm so over the facade of perfection.  I'm convinced that the people who try and make others think that their lives are perfect and they are perfect are the ones that are hurting the most.  If they can get others to think they are perfect, get some worship going, they may have a moment, or moments, where the pain subsides.

My earliest memories are of feelings of pain.  People talk about great childhood memories.  Not me.  I have some good memories.  Some that I may even be able to consider great.  However, my childhood was wrought with abandonment, rejection, manipulation, and abuse.  I was the caretaker physically, mentally, and emotionally.  I cannot remember a time when I was carefree.  I learned from a very young age that my words mattered.  To speak truth about my feelings was not allowed.  I was to always build the adults around me up.  It was my job and responsibility to take care of emotions.  To do otherwise resulted in the adult in charge becoming a raging victim.

I became a great actress.  I could have won an award type actress!  On occasion, I am still that little actress in a grown woman's body.  More than on occasion if I'm being honest.

As an adult, I continued in what I knew.  I knew how to excuse behaviors, cover up behaviors to protect the culprit, and blame myself.  Real healthy, I tell you!

There are still a few people in my life who are culprits.  Unfortunately, I cannot rid my life of them.  

I have learned how to take up for myself, bite back when needed, and consider the source (as my dad would say).

What used to cut me so low that I would allow myself to feel like the biggest loser and idiot now makes me angry.  It also makes me dislike the perpetrator(s).  

I used to struggle with this, as I am a Jesus loving girl.  I came to the realization that Jesus doesn't instruct us to put up with people's crap and poor treatment.  It's okay to dislike people.  We are called to ask for wisdom and discernment.  To be gifted with these means we are fully aware of behaviors and treatments that don't honor Jesus or look like Jesus.  

Jesus instructs us to love.  When we allow poor treatment, we aren't loving ourselves.  We also aren't truly loving the other person.  Plain and simple.

So forgiveness...

Nothing irks me more than a holier than thou person.  I am not going to feed you any of that.  I would likely throw up on myself while trying to type.

What I am going to tell you is that forgiveness for me and my sanity looks like realizing that no one gets to define me or treat me poorly.  When a person tries, I am going to take up for myself.  I am also going to walk away from a person or situation if possible.  

Biblically, forgiveness is giving it to God and not dwelling on it.  It's not excusing the person or ever allowing it.  

My advice to someone who is walking around feeling miserable because of someone's past or present treatment is to take up for yourself.  Sometimes this looks like not answering the person, not engaging in dialogue.  At times, it's walking away in the moment or for good.

I also have embraced boundaries.  I created specific boundaries for those in my life who harm me.  I stick to them too.  I refuse to share anything personal with those that I know will use the information against me at a later time.  I am not going to spend time with those who get their kicks off of kicking me to make themselves feel more important.  And a big one - I am not going to take care of other's emotions.  Ever.  

My definition of forgiveness goes something like this...

Forgiveness - the act of never allowing others to define you, rule you, or treat you poorly.  When someone behaves or speaks in an unkind or manipulative way, walk away and dust off the hurt.  Do not allow the pain to take up residence in your heart.  Consider the source!

I'm not going to lie, I have been known to say ugly things in my head as an ugly (on the inside!) person is trying to cut me down or treat me poorly.  It helps, just sayin'....

I hope this gives you hope, help, and a way out of the pain.

With great love,

Marci

Jesus' Pursuit of You

Jesus’ pursuit of us never stops.  He chases us all throughout our lives and desires to catch us no matter where He finds us.  Regardless of our pasts, present, and future lives, He wants us to know His undeniable and unmistakable love.  I promise you that nothing is too hard for Jesus.  You have not done or been anywhere that is a shock to Him.  He can do more than you can even imagine (Eph. 3:20) and I guarantee He will.

You may be thinking that this all sounds good for someone else.  You may feel that you have been away from Jesus or messed up so badly that there is no way that He would pursue you, let alone accept and love you.  This is exactly what the enemy wants you to believe.  This way of thinking keeps us separated from God and this is just what the enemy wants for your life.  Allow me to share pieces of my story.  I don’t share to shame those intertwined in my story.  I offer you glimpses into my life and heart so that you will know nothing halts Jesus’ pursuit of us.  He created you so that He could love you.  In fact, prior to creating you, He knew exactly what your choices and directions would be.  He loves you so much and desires for you to know this fully.  You did not repulse Him prior to creating you, and you haven’t repulsed Him now.

My earliest memories begin prior to the age of five.  They are not joyous ones, but rather ones of shame, anxiety, and guilt.  As far back as I can remember, I was my mother’s mother.  I knew exactly how I was to behave and what I needed to say to protect myself from wrath.  I was very aware that it was my responsibility to take care of my mother’s feelings.  I was not to ever say anything that made her feel uncomfortable.  Sharing my hurts, disappointments, and sadness was never to be done.  I was quite the actress.  As early as age five, I knew how to behave in such a way that kept my mother’s hurt feelings at bay.  She was the master of manipulation, and she lived in a highly decorated world of victimhood.  I understood I was considered a pain and a bother.  I was often told that my name was mud spelled backwards.  I heard this phrase often.  I was called a brat most days.  I was a shame filled child.  Every time an adult looked at me or spoke to me, I just knew they were thinking that I was a stupid, annoying child.

My parents divorced when I was two.  My biological father was not involved in my life at all.  He expected me to reach out to him and create a relationship.  I was told that he was an awful person and had tried to drown me because he did not want a girl.  I have no idea if that is true, but it certainly stung every time I heard it.  Prior to his death about twelve years ago, he wrote me a three-page letter on legal sized paper.  He let me know what a disappointment I was.  He quoted Scripture and tried to convince me that God, too, was disappointed in me. 

I also encountered sexual abuse.  As a young child, I would sleep with the lights on and cover my head with the blanket.  I often put something in front of my bedroom door to alert me to anyone trying to enter my room.  Not only was I the victim of physical sexual abuse, but I was also exposed to pornography and sex talk. 

As I grew into a teenager, I thought the only way to be worthy was to have a boy say it was so.  Unfortunately, my world revolved around having a boyfriend.  I did whatever I thought necessary to have and keep a boyfriend.  I’m sure you can surmise the pain this caused me.  My choices harmed me in more ways than I was aware of.  I forwent friendships in pursuit of boys.  I often spent time alone because I did not create or establish healthy relationships with friends or boys.  This would spiral me into believing I needed to do whatever it took to have a boy notice me.  I was the girl no mom wanted her daughter to be friends or son to date.

As a young adult, I began dating my husband.  It is more than fair to say that we were both a mess waiting to explode.  We married a year after college, and within our first few months of marriage we got pregnant and had our first child.  He was a beautiful child who stole my heart instantly.  By the time he was three months old, he was diagnosed with a congenital heart defect.  His first surgery was when he was six months old, and his second surgery occurred when he was four.  By this stage in my life, I was a crumbled mess.  I had major anxiety that I could barely control.  I was critiqued and criticized often for it.  I felt more alone than ever.  I was afraid to take my eyes off my son.  I could barely catch my breath and function.  I felt more alone than ever.  I suffered two miscarriages prior to our son’s second surgery.  The second miscarriage happened when I was four and a half months pregnant.  I cried often and struggled silently as I cared for my young child.  I found it almost impossible to function.  As time went on, I was told by many people who should have been there for me that I needed to get over it.  I was informed that I was weak and being self-centered.

Praise God, we were blessed with two more wonderful children.  There were several times when my children were young that I contemplated suicide.  I truly believed that my husband and children would be better off without me around.  I felt I hindered their lives because of my struggle with anxiety.  I felt that I was a bother and unlovable.  In fact, I can remember writing out my obituary and who my pall bearers would be.  The love I had for my children stopped me every time from going through with it.  When I would think upon my inability to follow through with it, I berated myself for even stinking at being able to successfully kill myself.

Not too long after I received the letter from my father, I completely shut down and lost it.  My oldest son was in junior high, and my daughter and youngest son were in elementary school.  My children were upstairs and I was downstairs cleaning the kitchen.  A feeling of pure disgust for myself completely overtook me and I began throwing dishes.  I was crying and didn’t have to ability to stop myself.  I was in such pain, but yet so numb.  I clearly remember sitting down on the kitchen floor and struggling to breathe.  I cannot explain it, but I felt a presence cover me and hold me.  It felt like a large human had wrapped his arms around me and was soaking in my pain.  When I think upon it, I can still vividly recall the physical sensations it caused.  My crying quieted.  I didn’t hear any spoken words, but I felt that I was being told it was going to be okay and that I was loved.  I remember quietly repeating, “I just want a daddy”.  I believe Jesus was there and comforting me.

Not long after that, I was invited to a Bible study at the church where my youngest son attended Pre-K.  I was so nervous that people would know my past and think I was a fake.  Something inside of me urged me to go anyway.  Upon hearing God’s word, I was hooked.  I couldn’t, and still can’t, get enough of His words and His love.  He has used me to share His love with others, and I still sometimes quietly say to Him, “Really God?  Me?”  I was such a mess and so broken.  I was sure I was beyond repair and not worthy of any kind of love.  Jesus thought differently.  He pursued me until I said yes.  Looking back upon my life, I see glimpses of His presence and protection.  He never gave up on me.  He never thought me too messed up and used up to forget about me.  I can now confidently say, “I am by beloved and He is mine” (Song of Solomon 2:16).

I have prayed that YOU will be convinced you are worth catching.  Jesus sees you, loves you, and wants you to be His.  He longs to feel you take comfort in Him.  He desires to show you how deeply He loves you.  He looks forward to the day that you and He are in deep relationship with one another, and you talk with Him all day long.  I pray that the words you read and study throughout the coming weeks will transform your heart and soul.  May you know you are worth catching and loving.  Be caught, by friend!

With deepest respect and love,

Marci 💗

Moving Out of the Corner of Pain

There are times in life where we all have wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits.  Life can get overwhelmingly difficult and the word hope is no longer in our vocabulary.  We feel defeated and question our choices, our circumstances, and even our faith.  Times like this can leave us feeling so alone, unheard, and unseen.  

This past year was one of those years for me.  Someone I love experienced some gut-wrenching pain and I crawled into the trenches to support, encourage, and love on this person.  While the experiences did not happen to me personally, watching someone you absolutely love suffer and question his/her existence is devastatingly painful.  At times, life became almost too hard to handle.  Because the person and I were so close, the pain that was felt by my loved one was often turned into hateful anger directed at me.  My level headed mind knew it was just deep-seated pain and was never a personal attack.  I won't lie, there were many times that the anger became too much and it cut my heart into a zillion pieces.  On top of that, I was painfully heartbroken for this person and felt so much anger, betrayal, hurt, etc.  

As I woke each morning, and often throughout the day, I prayed for my loved one.  At first, my prayers were to surround my love, comfort my love, and heal my love.  I prayed that God would set a table before my love in the presence of the enemies.  I prayed that those who caused the pain would suffer greatly and feel exactly what they had inflicted.

As time went on, I realized my prayers were filled with bitterness.  They were also very limiting.  God can do so much more than we can imagine and I needed to praise Him for this, as well as pray loving prayers over the enemies.  At first, I gritted my teeth as I prayed blessings over those who caused such heart devastation.  It was unfathomable to me to pray that those who had caused so much harm would receive blessings.

The more I prayed for them, however, the more God opened my heart to feel empathy and forgiveness.  I began to pray for my loved one to grow closer to God in the pain.  I prayed that my love would recognize God's sovereignty and constant presence, even in the trenches.  I also prayed that the inflicters would know God's love.  I began to realize that those who are hurting hurt others.  I prayed that rather than feeling pain like I originally prayed for, that they would feel freedom and peace.

As God always does, He heard my prayers and answered them.  My loved one has more strength, courage, and drive for life than I ever imagined possible.  My love experienced true feelings of forgiveness and mercy.  There are no grudges, no retaliation hopes, and no ill will.  My love is truly free, joyous, and happy.  So many opportunities have presented themselves and so much growth has taken place.  

While I would never wish for my love to suffer so greatly, so much was gained from this experience.  Life lessons about God, love, forgiveness, strength, and a will to live happily were gained.  I no longer feel anger about the situation, but rather grateful for the growth that has taken place.  

Life lessons often come from pain.  We can stay stuffed in a corner with ridiculously bitter hearts or we can open our hearts to God's leading, growing, and healing.  Am I ever grateful that my love chose the latter!

You may be wondering what became of the offenders.  God is definitely at work in their lives.  A couple of the people actually accepted responsibility and apologized.  That is huge!  I continue to pray for them and have great hope that they will feel God's love and mercy with such force that they will know the source.  My love offers them forgiveness and mercy, which I truly believe they feel.  

If you find yourself in the trenches and feel alone, abandoned, hopeless, and helpless, know that you are not alone.  God is with you and waiting for you to ask for help and guidance.  Pour your heart out to Him and trust that He hears you.  He created you to love you, not to hurt you.  Often, lessons hurt like major heck, but the growth that comes is worth it.  We will never grow hiding away with bitter hearts.  Growth and healing are results of lots of knee time in prayer.  Be honest in your pain and in your prayers.  Look for the teeny blessings that God provides for you each day.  Those teeny blessings add up.

One moment at a time in trust and you will feel and see God direct your heart to Him.

Loving you so much-

Marci

Mindset Changes Everything

Mindset is defined as "the established set of attitudes held by someone." (Dictionary.com)

Our mindsets are so important to our overall health.  The stress that we allow into our bodies through our mindsets can wreak havoc on our health.  We can eat nothing but whole foods, exercise regularly, but if our mindsets are programmed to think negatively and destructively, we are not contributing to a healthy lifestyle.  Rather, we are harming our bodies.  This harm has immediate and lasting effects on our overall health.

Controlling our mindsets should be one of our top priorities.  We can't just say to our minds, "Alright, already-stop this way of thinking!"  That's impossible.  It is a process that takes time and dedication.  If it were easy and quick, we would all have mindsets that support healthy living.  Unfortunately, many of us have mindsets that are extremely destructive and we are so caught up in it that we don't even realize the negative effects it has on our lives and bodies.

The benefits of a healthy mindset are:

• increased longevity
• reduces depression
• lowers levels of anxiety
• increases immunity
• reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease
• promotes healthy relationships

Thankfully, there are many ways in which we can train our mindsets.  They take practice, but they are so worth it.  In time, you will notice more peace in your life.  You will recognize when a destructive thought enters your brain and be able to push it away quickly.  You will feel freer and happier.

Techniques for growing a healthy mindset:

1.  Guard your minds - be mindful of what and who you are listening to and watching.  Be aware of how these things make you feel and what they cause you to focus on.

2.  Be proactive rather than reactive - be mindful of what and who pushes your buttons.  Establish game plans on how best to deal with these situations BEFORE they happen.

3.  Surround yourself with people and places that honor and promote a healthy mindset -this one needs no explanation! :)

4.  Banish negative self-talk -  we all have times where we allow our minds to go on a negative road trip.  We have gone clear across the country before we even realize it.  This leaves us feeling grumpy and depleted.  Be extremely mindful of EVERYTHING you are thinking upon.  If you notice ugliness, change your talk immediately.  There is no room in the inn for negative self-talk.  Not one good thing comes from it.

5.  Live a balanced life - be sure to practice self-care.  When we give to others and deny ourselves, we become overwhelmed and our mindsets are not supportive.

6.  Help others - it is amazing what happens to our mindsets when we help others!

7.  Be grateful - I often suggest to people that they keep a gratitude journal with them at all times.  Set a goal for how many things you want to record.  It often helps to break it up into times of the day.  When we only do it in the morning or evening, we forget to focus on gratefulness throughout the day.

These techniques really will change your mindset for the better.  With time and practice, you will feel better and happier.  You will notice your stress levels diminishing and your energy levels rising.

You CAN do this!  I believe in you and your health!


Proverbs 23:7...As someone thinks within himself, so he is.

Marci

Learning to Take Care of Yourself

Mark 6:31

He said to them, "Come away by yourselves to a remote place and rest for a while."
For many people were coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.

When my oldest was a baby, we lived in New York.  My husband and I are both from Texas and our little one was the first grandchild on both sides.  Needless to say, we flew home a LOT!!

Every time we flew, the flight attendants made sure I knew that if there was an emergency I needed to put my oxygen mask on before putting a mask on my little one.  Thankfully, I never had to experience this for real!

Because of all the flying we did, I adopted the phrase, "Put your oxygen mask on first".  When I am speaking to new mamas, worn out friends, or even myself I use this phrase.

We cannot be at our best if we feel depleted and lack the fuel we need to operate.  On a plane, lack of oxygen will cause us to pass out and eventually die.  In life, lack of care for ourselves will cause burnout, depression, anxiety, and lots and lots of stress.

Often times, we feel guilty and/or selfish if we take time for ourselves.  We carry around the mentality that we have to be super people who give, give, give and never relax.  In our world, if someone is not a super achiever, they are labeled a slacker.  Thankfully, that is not God's label.  He created rest and desires for us to use it.  He knows that without some rest and rejuvenation, we will not be on our game.

God did not create us to save the world.  He did not create us to fix everything, solve everything, and be everything to people.  We will never be difference makers if we fail to take care of the person God created us to be.

Putting on your oxygen mask will ensure that your heart and head are well rested.  You will feel revived and refreshed.  There is no shame in needing your oxygen mask!

Individual oxygen masks look different for each person. 

For me, I like to wake before my family and have a quiet time with Jesus.  Also, it helps me to read at least one chapter in a book each day.  This reading can occur anytime throughout the day.  It is soothing for my soul to steal away and get lost in a book.

My husband's oxygen mask consists of quiet time alone doing yard work.  It is so soothing to him and allows his mind to be refreshed.

What does your oxygen mask look like? 

What causes you to feel refueled and refreshed? 

What is holding you back?  Keeping you from getting your God prescribed rest?

No matter what your oxygen mask looks like, don't be ashamed to admit you need it.  Failing to consistently put it on will cause you to feel overwhelmed and lack the essential body and mind energy to successfully conquer each day.

Taking care of yourself is not selfish, it is energy for your soul.

If you find it difficult at first, try scheduling it out.  Make yourself a priority, sweet friend.  There is joy in rest and rejuvenation.

And when you find it difficult to settle down and rest because of guilt, a mile long to-do list, etc., remember the words of your Savior - the one who calls you to rest.

Mark 6:31

He said to them, "Come away by yourselves to a remote place and rest for a while."

For many people were coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.

Loving you all,
Marci

Living Beyond our Pasts and into the Futrure

Do you have a closet of skeletal bones that if the door was opened, you would be horrified?  Do you have past sins that pain you when you think upon them?

Yeah, me too.  My heart aches at some of my past choices and sins.  Sometimes I think upon them with such shame and wonder what in the world was I thinking!?

Actually, I know exactly what I was thinking when I was buried in the sins that cause me great shame.  I was a broken mess searching for clarity, worth, and anyone to save me.  I looked for anyone and anything to validate me and tell me that I mattered.

Any chance you can relate?

If I think about it hard enough, I can still feel the terrible gnawing at my heart.  The quiet, but powerful begging for someone to love me.  Gracious, there are times I just want to give that old girl a hug.

I am proof - as you may be too - that ugly messes can turn into beautiful and mighty workers for Christ.

There are still times, however, that the stupid devil tries to get me to feel the bitterness of shame and regret.  The pest screams at me when I'm feeling down that I will never matter because of my past.  He likes to tell me that if my biological father didn't love me, no one else really does or will either.

He's a liar.  In fact, he's the father of lies.  He has no truth in him.  You and I should NEVER believe him.

If  I feel the heavy heat of shame try and overtake my heart, I have to remind myself that Jesus' ways are not my ways.  His thinking is not mine.  He isn't seated on His beautiful throne reliving my disgusting sins.  He is not reliving yours either.  He is filling His heart each moment with love for us. He is looking upon our obedience and desire to live for Him and saying, "That's my girl!  I have faith in you, sweet child."

You may be reading this and thinking, "How on earth can you be so sure?  You have no idea of the sins I have in my locked up closet."

I know because Jesus tells us it's so.  Allow me to show you-

{If you have a Bible available, read the entire account in Luke 7:36-50.}

Luke 7:36-50 tells us that Jesus was at the home of a Pharisee dining when a woman who was labeled a sinner came in and wept at His feet.  She cleansed Jesus' feet with her painful tears and rubbed her very expensive fragrant oil on them.  The Pharisee was outwardly horrified and disgusted.  He asked Jesus if He knew what kind of woman was touching Him and how on earth He could allow it.

The town had labeled the woman a sinner.  You can be certain they had names for her and liked to make themselves feel superior by condemning her.  We are all sinners so I am led to believe that she had a very open sin that the town knew about.  The Scriptures do not detail her sin but if my guess is correct, I would say she was a prostitute.  I would bet she had a harried past and felt great shame and embarrassment.  I would also bet that many in the town treated her like yesterday's trash and looked down upon her.

Jesus sternly tells the Pharisee that those who are forgiven much, love much.  Jesus also assures the woman that she is forgiven. 

Read Jesus' words and allow them to penetrate to your core.  If needed, write them on an index card and keep it with you to read often until you know without a doubt that those sweet words are spoken directly to you and about you.

Luke 7:50

And He said to (insert your name),  "Your faith has saved you.  Go in peace."

He does not shame her or validate the Pharisee.  He actually calls the Pharisee out for being...well a Pharisee.  

In Luke 7:44-47, Jesus basically calls the Pharisee out for being so condescending, rude, and pious.  I love it!

Jesus isn't about to let people condemn His loves and get away with it.  He stands for us every single time.

Let me show you a few verses that prove my statement above.

Luke 6:37-38

Do not judge and you will not be judged.  Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned.  Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  Give, and it will be given to you; a good measure - pressed down, shaken together, and running over - will be poured into your lap.  For the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.  

John8:7

When they persisted in questioning Him, He stood up and said to them, "The one without sin among you should be the first to throw a stone at her."

James 4:11-12

Don't criticize one another brothers.  He who criticizes and brother or judges his brother criticizes the law and judges the law.  But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.  There is one lawgiver and judge who is able to save and to destroy.  But who are you to judge your neighbor?

See what I mean - Jesus doesn't take judging and condemning lightly.  When you experience them, know that Jesus sees and doesn't like it.  Nobody messes with His girls!

The best part of this story is told to us from the account in Matthew 26:13-

I assure you:  Wherever this gospel is proclaimed in the whole world, what this woman has done will also be told in memory of her.

Jesus assures us that our faith will be remembered, not our sins.  Our legacies will be based on our faith and devotion to Christ, not on our harried pasts that make our hearts heavy at times.

Isn't that an awesome balm for our hearts?!  I don't know about you, but that is beautiful music to my heart!  He takes our uglies and turns them into our beauties.  He takes our past (our testimonies) and uses them to show the glory of His love and Kingdom. 

Now that is some amazing mercy and grace!  Let's all shout amen and hallelujah!

While many of us wish we could erase our past sins, they are actually what have caused our hearts to be so devoted to our Savior.  Because we have been forgiven much, we love Him so very much.  He cleaned up our messes and threw His loving arms around us.  He welcomes us into His great Kingdom with open arms and a love that spins our heads with great devotion.

Be encouraged, sweet friends.  You are loved with a great fierceness by your King.

Loving you all will an overflowing heart of adoration-

Marci

The Joys of Obedience

We often hear that obedience to God is our ticket to living in freedom and joy.  I raise my hands to the heavens because I could go for a strong dose of freedom and joy over certain areas of my life.  If you are breathing, I'm confidant that you, too, could use some life changing freedom as well.

As I sat in prayer this morning, I realized that maybe I don't even truly know what obedience looks like.  I have a confession to make - I have really struggled with a pit of fear and worry.  I have made the pit part of my life and now it just shows up and thinks I've invited it in.  In reality, I guess I have.  I have allowed my mind to think upon the worry and play it out in my head a million times a day.  Oh how I wish I were exaggerating....

I pray daily for God to release me from this mindset.  I even beg for freedom some days.  Can you relate?  You may not be struggling with fear, but do you feel held captive by something in your life?  Captivity can seep into our marrow so deeply until we decorate it and call it normal.  Anything that prohibits us from pure joy and freedom is called captivity.  The definition of captivity is "the state or period of being held, imprisoned, enslaved, or confined".  (Dictionary.com)

Jesus came to set the captives free and give us a life of abundance.  I realized that I am the hold out, not Him.  He longs to give us the desires of our hearts when they line up with His will.  I truly believe Him when he says:

A thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy.  I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance.  John 10:10

That thief is none other than our enemy.  He wants to steal anything good that Jesus offers us.  His lies convince us to search for freedom outside of Jesus.  Every time we buy into his lies, we find ourselves in captivity.  In order to be set free, we must whole heartedly be obedient to God.  Period.

But what is obedience?  How can we truly be obedient to Christ and live the abundant life He offers us?

Hollman's Illustrated Bible Dictionary defines obedience as to hear God's word and act accordingly.

Sounds good, right?  But how do we implement this into our lives?  For years, I have heard that I needed to be obedient to Christ, but I don't think I ever sat and really examined what obedience looks like.  I assumed that if I was living as God instructed, I was being obedient.  After researching the definition and passages in the Bible, I believe it goes way deeper.

After dissecting the definition of obedience, I came up with 3 ways that we can become obedient children of God.

1.  Prayer

We must pray daily and consistently.  To pray, is to have conversation with God.  Just as we talk with loved ones, talk with Jesus.  It is not meant to be fancy.  In fact, He doesn't call for us to be theologians and use elaborate terms.  Jesus longs to hear from us right as we are.  Simply, prayer is just talking openly and honestly with God.  Nothing you say will shock Him.

1 Thessalonians 5:17

Pray constantly

I believe that praying constantly means having our hearts set on Jesus.  He does not expect us to neglect our duties, our loves, and ourselves.  Having a mindset for Christ is essentially praying because we are doing everything for Him and through Him.  For example, when you prepare a meal for your family, you do it because you love them and want to offer nourishment in a delicious way.  Loving your family through cooking for them is having a heart for Jesus because He gave you your family and expects you to take care of them.  When you do so with a loving and kind heart, you are in the mindset of Christ.

As we pray (stay in the mindset of Jesus), we must recognize the ways He speaks to us.  He desires a relationship with us.  A relationship by definition is between two people.  Jesus speaks to us in so many ways.  Unfortunately, all too often we don't hear because we never slow our minds down enough to hear Him or recognize Him.  Jesus speaks to us through His written word, through others, through song, through that still small voice we hear - just to name a few.

Prayer is obedience to God because it causes us to think upon Him and His ways.  It creates a relationship and allows His love to richly flow into our lives.  When we seek Him and invite Him into our lives through prayer, He always shows up.

Jeremiah 29:13

You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all of your heart.

2.  Trust Jesus in all things

Trust is giving our whole hearts to Jesus, no matter what.  Trust means relinquishing the idea of control and fully opening our hands and giving Him everything we are holding on to.  This can be a tough one because we are under the falsehood that we are best at orchestrating our lives.  Letting go of our need to be in control can be very scary.  What if we hand the reigns over and then life doesn't go the way we planned?  I have discovered in the areas of my life that I totally trust Jesus, I have perfect peace.  Believe me, those areas were far from peaceful before I decided to trust Him and allow Him to lead me.  I am in awe and amazed at the beautiful blessings He has given me because of my decision to let go and trust.

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my hearts TRUSTS in Him and I am helped.

Isaiah 40:31

Those who TRUST in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not faint.

Can I get an amen!?!  I love the Lord's promises.  I think we could all use some soaring on wings like eagles.  

3.  Surrender our lives to Jesus

To surrender means to give up control.  When we surrender to God, we set aside our plans and eagerly seek His.  We look to His ways and desires and align our thoughts, actions, and beliefs with Him.  We live to serve Him and know Him.  As we go about our days, we can't help but share His love with those we encounter.  We pray for discernment and hearts that will recognize our sinful ways.  When we completely surrender to Christ, our hearts will be filled with the joy of the Lord and we will find great strength through Him.

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look, new things have come.

Surrendering takes effort and daily action.  Just saying we surrender will not do.  We must be proactive and mindful every single day.  Philippians 4:4-9 is a wonderful instruction manual for surrender.  We will be wise to write it on our hearts and walk in it daily.

Philippians 4:4-8

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your graciousness be know to everyone.  The Lord is near.  Don't worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Growing in our obedience will take time.  Beautiful flowers do not overtake gardens over night.  They grow slowly and gracefully and before we know it, their radiance shines so brightly that we can't help but be attracted to them.  God sees our desires and efforts to be obedient children of His.  He knows our deepest hearts and longs to help us along our journey.  All we have to do is ask for His guidance, strength, and wisdom.  It may be difficult to become completely obedient, but I know it will be so worth it.  Nothing feels as good as freedom and joy in Christ.  

Won't you join me on my obedience journey?  Oh the joys that await us....

Loving each and every one of you beauties-

Marci