Monday, October 8, 2012
31 days of love...day 8
Psalm 103:4...He redeems your life from the Pit; He crowns you with faithful love and compassion.
I sat on the floor crying and feeling a pain like no other. The pain was gut wrenching and wouldn't cease to let up. The thing that kept running through my mind was that I just wanted to go home to my Father. The pain of my past was too severe. The deep need for love from my parents overwhelmed me. I didn't have the strength to even raise my head. My husband scooped me up off of the floor and held me while I cried.
I had been in my very first Bible study for a couple of months. My heart was opening to Jesus and I was hungry like never before. Satan saw that I was letting go of his life and running to my Savior. He attacked me so swiftly and in a way like I had never been attacked before.
As a child, I lived in a pit of all kinds of dysfunction and abuse. As a teenager and young adult, I continued to live in that pit. I did not live for Jesus, I lived for me. I searched everywhere for love. My heart ached to know what love felt like.
Looking back on that life brings me great sadness, but also great adoration for my Redeemer. He waited patiently for me to raise my eyes to Him, call out to Him, and let Him save me. As I sat in my husband's lap, I began to feel the love of Jesus overtake me. My life didn't have to be painful, it could be peaceful and full of love from my Jesus. He would make something of this girl's life. I didn't have to live in a pit. I didn't have to believe the enemy's lies that I was worthless, unloved, and stupid. My Redeemer called me HIS. I was somebody, I was His daughter. The realization of that fact was so powerful.
You see, Satan wants us to live in pits. He knows that we look to ourselves rather than God when we are down there. He even has a way of making pits attractive and desirable. The thing is, once we are in that pit we feel helpless and alone. There are no staircases leading us out. Only the Mighty Hand of God can release us from pain and strongholds. He loves us more than we can even imagine. He desires to set us free, to give us a life of freedom. When we reach up to Him for deliverance, He will crown us with His faithful love and compassion.
My sweet sister, if you are in a pit of any kind, call out to Jesus. He hears every whisper and cry for help. He loves you like no other love. Regardless of how you got into the pit, Jesus can, and will, deliver you. The light you see when you are freed from the darkness of your pit will be the most beautiful sight.
My love to all who have ever been in a pit and to those are stuck there now. As Beth Moore says, "There is no high like the Most High." May your day be filled with His loving arms wrapped tightly around you.